'My search for a better half'

I would like to thank my parents (J & S) and a Mumbai based friend of mine called 'G' (who was incidentally roomies with me for 2 years in USA) for their feedback and thoughts in contributing to my first blog titled 'My search for a better half'.

Sometime in the summer of 2008, my parents started their search for a 'suitable' girl for me. Never in their wildest dreams did they anticipate that the journey would be so challenging that they would be forced to read management books in order to market their only Son.

They say that one's fate is written in those 12 odd boxes in the 'Janamkundali' and that it was good omen if there was an exact match between the groom's and bride's janamkundali. My parents tasted their first success in their search for a 'suitable girl' approximately a week after they officially launched me in a publication. The girl was working in a reputed MNC in Bangalore and has been working for over 2 years. I was told to send her an email as some kind of introduction about myself and this was followed by few SMS exchanges. Subsequently, both parties agreed that we should meet personally at least once before we decide to take this forward. We decided to meet at a CCD which is stationed near to the Forum Mall. Both of us arrived at the venue on the agreed date. We indulged in some small talk and started discussing all the things under the sun and after close to an hour, I told her that I had some work in office and had to leave. She asked me to let her know about my decision so that we can take it forward appropriately. I must say that somehow I didn't like this girl. Gradually as time passed (a month later), I started liking her but by this time it was too late......!!

Despite this minor hiccup, my parents were in high spirits that they started chanting SRK-Kajol starrer DDLJ'S dialogues to keep me cheered up. After a brief lull of a few weeks, I happened to meet the second girl. She too was working in a reputed MNC and had the habit of 'switching companies' aka changing organizations every year. In the span of 2.5 years she had changed 3 organizations and in all probability was earning more than me. But that didn't scare me one bit!!. Her parents were kind enough to pay us a visit at my residence and were impressed with our family background. Nevertheless, they grilled my parents with lots of questions.

When their turn came, my parents didn't ask any questions and I must say that they don't like to question other's personal and professional issues no matter how close he or she may be. After this, I got a call from this second girl's mother where she mentioned that her daughter wanted to chit chat with me over the phone/chat. She sent me an 'add request' to my personal id which I accepted gracefully and soon we started chatting progressing aggressively. She was more interested in knowing about my financial status and liquidity (I didn't know this term until then) and all her questions were revolving around Property/Finance/My Salary which I must say that is a thousand lesser than hers. She didn't even give me any opportunity to throw my questions at her and her questions kept circling around the MONEY. Since I didn't get any chance to grill her, I thought of pinging her in chat window the very next day. I started by wishing her and asked for few minutes to talk stating that she didn't let me ask any questions during our brief interaction. She said that she needed her parents permission for this and that she can't talk to me until she got her parents approval. I was flabbergasted. I narrated this conversation and my decision to my parents who tried to convince me saying that these are common questions and that I should not get worried. Looks like the girl came to know about my displeasure and soon she blocked me from the chat window. This was the biggest insult this 'Pavum guy' was gifted by anybody till date.

Meanwhile I met the third girl's parents/guardians which was not as challenging as the previous two and hence not worth mentioning. My parents came across the fourth girl in a publication and they liked the girl's profile so much that they contacted the girl's father. My dad introduced himself and briefed them about our family background. The girl's dad reciprocated with their history and started enquiring about my qualifications. He also went ahead and said that they were more interested in B.E + MBA/MS/BTech + MBA/MS types and he can't accept anything short of this. I personally and sincerely feel that one should marry a person for what he/she is than his/her profession. Till today I don't have a clue about what this girl's dad was thinking and I am sure everybody else feels the same.

Due to the after effects of recession, I thought of giving a break to my search and conveyed the same to my parents. A couple of months later, I started showing interest again and my parents came up with another girl for me. She was working in Bangalore in a reputed MNC for the past 2 years. Our horoscopes matched to the maximum and even the astrologer vouched that this was best a guy can expect. My parent's joy knew no bounds when they got a call from the girl's parents where they appreciated my horoscope and this was followed by the girl's relatives visiting my home. I must say that the parents on both sides were keen for us (me and the girl) to ink the deal at any cost. The girl's father is a trigger savvy guy and he even went ahead with engagement dates which were a good sign/omen. All this was happening in the background when I was yet to see the girl face to face!!. I got her contact number and for a change I was told to send an email to her official ID which I did and was promptly replied.

I gave here a call on the same night and for around 7 minutes we discussed about our meeting details. She said that the following Monday would be good and that we should meet outside her office premises. I think I made a mistake of not chatting with her during the weekends.. Otherwise I could have inked the deal somehow :). On Monday morning, she was kind enough to call me and said that she was prepared to cover half the distance and that I need not take the pain of going up to Whitefield. I told her not to worry since Whitefield was an easier option for me to commute. My dad called me 5 minutes before the scheduled meeting and told me not to be over objectionable to the questions this girl was going to ask.

She told me to send her a message once I reach 'Marathalli' so that she can 'prepare herself' and looks like I made a big mistake in messing up with this. I somehow forgot to message her. Instead, I gave her a direct ring on her mobile from her office premises. She came down and first thing she asked is, "Didn't I tell you to message me once u reach M .....". I didn't have any answer to that and I apologized. My Mumbai based friend tells me that girls get pissed off when you don't do what they tell you to do and I sealed my fate there :).

I was looking for a restaurant where we could sit and chat but there was none in the area.....searched around 4 of the hotels near by but all were closed and were expected to open after 6 PM. So there was no option other than sitting outside a shopping mall. What I learnt from here is that you must know the topography of the place you are supposed to go to for the date and in no way you can afford to search for CCD's and Barista's at the 11th hour. I thought it was OK and I should make a move.....we shook hands and parted ways. I was somewhat ok with this girl and I gave big thumbs up to my parents.

My parents were waiting for an answer from the girl's side and after 2 days they got a call of rejection ......The girl said 'Tell them not to wait for me' as if we are waiting for the beauty queen to turn up :). Her parents were more upset than mine and I could understand that since both were very keen to move forward.

I am still analyzing what could have possibly gone wrong. Is it because all the girls mentioned above have their names starts with 'R.....'? or possibly that I never asked any career oriented questions? There is a general perception among everybody that I am a bit too serious by nature and people think that I spend most of the time reading than doing other things. From my experience, I concluded that in general 'WOMEN ARE FULL OF SECRETS' and the complex algorithm which works in their favor is always very taxing for others to analyze/comprehend. No matter how many girls you meet you will never be able to unravel the mystery behind their logic.

To be continued.




Disclaimer:In no way I meant to show any disrespect to any woman ( both whom I met and those whom I am about to meet).I just thought of presenting a funny side of the story .